Blooming Life Coaching
An Empowering Partnership Aiming at YOUR SUCCESS!Archive for July, 2008
What you FOCUS on EXPANDS!!
Are there some areas you would like to change? Are there some things in your life that you would like more? or less?
Do you feel that you may not be getting the best results that you could get in the areas that matter most to you?
It may be a question of FOCUS.
Let me ask you a few more questions: Do you happen to say “oh, but I can’t help myself, that’s the way I am!” or “I am always forgetting to do that, and I always end up getting angry or resigning when I should be strong and try further!” or something like “this damn impatience of mine, it makes me miss some great opportunities!”
Could that be that you are focusing on your limits? could it be that you spend a lot of time considering your weakness and where you came short?”
May I suggest you another alternative? why not changing your perspective and concentrating on your strengths? on your achievements? on your possibilities and skills?
If you may agree with me that what you focus on DOES really expand itself, do you start seeing the potential for increased opportunity and renewed fulfillment?
Let me give you a few examples:
A woman has been lately confessing being complaining every day, day long, that her husband and her children were egoistical, untidy and unconsidering for her by leaving her all the housework to do, and increasing her amount of work by leaving all their clothes and personal things lying all over the house.
It is all as simple as that, by focusing all day long on how uncaring her family was, this woman made her life miserable, adding to this that she increasingly felt lonely, trapped in the feeling of not being loved, of being considered like a mere piece of furniture in the house, she finally ended up growing more ironic and self-centered, distant and cold to her family’s concerns.
Why do you think did the situation grow into something that not only made the woman’s life miserable, but also the lives of the people living around her?
She built and raised up a monument of unfullfillment because the only thing she focused on was what was lacking in her life, was she complained about, putting herself in the role of a victim, of a passive victim of what was happening in her life.
Can you admit with me, that it is highly possible that the different members of her family did love her? that although they did not tidy up their things they spent time together in the evening, they went out eating, riding bicycle or listening to music together? Although her husband did leave his socks on the floor, he went out everyday, working to provide the family with enough opportunity to live a pleasant life. He probably did take his wife in the arms while they watched TV at night, and did tell her that she was beautifully dressed up for that particular day when they visited their friends.
So, we do have the power to make our lives miserable or happy, we do have the possibility of considering things looking at them from different angles and perspectives. We Do have the CHOICE between drawing motivation and strength from ALL THE THINGS that already go well, or sapping our interest and energy by concentrating on ALL THE THINGS that are going wrong.
I would just remind your that we DO have options, you do have choices to take between choosing to fall under the pressure and weight of all the things that are not going as they Should be going, feeling powerless and stuck in front of an insurmountable mountain of work. OR, you can CHOOSE to empower yourself by focusing on what already goes well, and which ACTION you can take to develop and capitalize on your strengths, by building on what you already achieved and choose to work day by day to bring those things to the next level so that they will naturally help building down the things that are less satisfying in yourself, and in your world.
AND, although changing perspective may not modify your circumstances to 360 degree right away, changing your perspective, and FOCUSING on what is strong in your life, developing what is already good will contribute to modifying your attitude, and the effect circumstances have on you. Instead of feeling down and powerless, as if your destiny was depending on all the things that matter to you, you will find yourself the master of your thoughts, you will feel RESPONSIBLE for your life and will see increasing opportunities to take action to start MAKING your life more like you would like it to be.
As a matter of fact, I just want to encourage you to make the choice on changing your FOCUS, changing the glasses through which you see the world, and directing your eyes to what empowers you, to what fills your heart and life with hope, strength and motivation, looking ahead and positively working day by day on the things that you would like to change.
I wish you a wonderful day, and don t forget:: WHAT YOU FOCUS ON EXPAND!! ;o))
I’d be happy to know what you focus on: what are your strengths? what did you already achieve? what can you do to change your perspective? what are your dreams? what are the things you will achieve? what are your plans of actions for a positiver future?
Best greetings, Naomi
You have the Passport to HappinessLand!!!
What are you waiting for people to show to you? Interest? Care? Love? Affection? Does it happen that you are waiting them to meet your every need? Are you awaiting that they motivate you, that they help you discover and grow your potential? Would you like them to be attentive to you emotions? Reactions? Feelings? Would you be happier if you felt considered or if somebody would ask you about your sentimental, emotional, spiritual, or professional life? If somebody would check up with you if everything is ok?
How would it feel like to have people like this in your life?
Would you enjoy having people like this around you?
Do you want to have somebody like this in your life?
The answer is simple: it is POSSIBLE and it all depends on YOU!
You know what? You have the ability and everything you need more than anybody else to be that person for yourself who cares about your every single need. You have the keys to the doors that lie in yourself, in your thoughts, in your heart, in your life!! The first advantage is that you are entitled with all the access, you have the “passport” to enter the country that you are, and if you start wanting to enter and discover that land of yours, you have the privilege of being able to access all the regions that you want to learn about, that you want to develop, and whose well-being you want.
Did you realize that? All the privileges that you may sometimes be willing to hand in other people, you have!
The only thing that goes with it, is RESPONSIBILITY.
As a matter of fact, you want people to take you into consideration: take yourself into consideration!
You would like people to love you: love yourself!
You would like people to understand you: try to understand yourself!
You would like to feel in tune with people: try to be in tune with yourself!
You would like people to meet your every need: how can people really know about your needs if you yourself don’t pay attention and dont do anything to care for your needs??
I know you may say… this all so easy to say, this is all so theoretical, this is all motivational thinking!
But, if you may give these ideas a few minutes of thought, don’t you think, that if you would start thinking about your needs, and really try doing something about these, your situation would improve? Don’t you think that if you would start loving yourself the way you would like people to love you, you would give yourself the opportunity to move forward to new levels of satisfaction? — I mean, believing in yourself, trusting yourself to make the best out of your abilities, encouraging yourself that “you have what it takes”, that it is possible for you to go forward and feel better, and reach new grounds of fulfillment?
It all starts with you! And, the truth of the matter is, that if you start loving yourself, trying to do more of what makes you happy, and to do less of what makes you feel confused, you will see that not only you will feel better in tune with yourself, day after day, you will like better the face, the smile, the sparkling eyes you see in the mirror in the morning, but people around you will feel good in your presence.
Not only you will feel better about yourself, but people will be attracted to you, you will build bridges, you will give people signals that you are a great person to be with, and this light around you that you will be creating will provide you with even more opportunities to make friends, to have great conversations, to enrich your relationships, and maybe restore some disconnected or difficult relationships that you may have. This will be a natural consequence of your being your own friend, of your taking care of yourself. People will feel less pressured by a possible demanding attitude, they wont feel pressed away by the fear that somebody may grow dependent on them.
Start paying attention and caring about yourself, and others will also be attracted to you, meet you own needs, and they may want to consider helping you through it, but starting doing that yourself, you wont be depending on them and their approbation, help or acceptation. Your personal value will not depend on people’s perception of you and you will feel free. Wouldn’t that be a great feeling to have? To feel free to be yourself? to feel free to be the best you can be? to start taking action to reach your potential and feel really free and happy starting NOW, no matter the circumstances!?!!
If you think about wanting to change something and start taking care of yourself, I wish you all the best on your journey!! I’d be happy to hear about your development, and the increase of happiness you will feel, step by step…and if you feel that you may need help through that process of self-discovery and journey towards fulfillment, just contact me, i ll be happy to support you through this amazing adventure!!
i wish you a wonderful day, Naomi
